a mother’s limitations

What do you do as a parent when God has entrusted four little people to your care and you do not have four sets of hands, four sets of eyes, or four bodies to watch their moves and attend to all their needs? What do you do when you have one laying on the changing table waiting for a fresh pamper because of a blow-out, another sitting on the toilet pulling toilet paper as fast as he can off the roll and stuffing it in to the toilet he is sitting on because of toilet-training, and two boys wrestling on the second level of the bunk bed prior to quiet-time because we are boys.

Or.

when your 4 and 5 year old sons decide to crawl out through the third floor window and see the city from the vantage point of the roof

when the 4 year old breaks the neighbors’ window while excitedly hitting on it to communicate with the neighbor boy inside the window

when they play ding-dong-ditch on neighbors’ doors one afternoon

when they find a cardboard fort in a different neighbor’s (who had been previously friendly and invited the boys onto his property multiple times) yard and accidentally mess it up by crawling into it.  but the neighbor does not view it as an accident

when they bike so fast down the sidewalk that they scare a elderly neighbor lady

when they yell at neighbor children several houses down from us

when they pick up pebbles to throw across the street and the new neighbors, who don’t understand English, think they are throwing at their vehicle.

when they accidentally break a neighbor’s rickety gate

when we have “playdates” with neighbors where I think we could model a good, loving family who plays well together but reality sets in when I spend all my time helping one of my boys learn the value of sharing his toys when he doesn’t want to or kissing the bruise of another son who was pushed by his older brother

We chose to live in the city with the intent of sharing Jesus’ love with our neighbors.

And here we are – offending one neighbor, trespassing into anther’s yard, destroying property at yet another.   

I am pretty sure I am failing you, Lord, at being Your hands and feet to the people on our street.

And Jesus reminded me.

Kendra, you are not capable of watching your children at ALL moments of ALL the day.  I gave you these four sons for you to love and train, yes.  I want you to discipline, form good rhythms and routines, rise early, and be proactive in your teaching and training.  But you cannot protect them from all things.  You cannot control them at all times.  You cannot always be present.

They are boys.

They are human.

You will all make mistakes.

This is exactly where I want you.  Realizing your own limitations.  You are dependent on ME – you need me to watch over your boys.  You need to ask me for help on a continual basis.

This is exactly where I want your boys.  While I expect you to teach and train them as much as you are able, there are also times when I will call them to learn lessons outside of your jurisdiction.  One day they will leave and go to school or go to the job or go with their friends.  You will not be able to be with them in all those scenarios so start trusting them to me today; in the little moments when you need to attend to the baby or go to the basement to switch the laundry.  I am their ultimate teacher.  There are times when they will need to simply learn the lessons that I have for them to learn.

And you can also trust me with the ways that I am choosing to use your family in the neighborhood.  If I would have wanted your neighbors to see a perfect family, I could have done that.  I am not asking you to be perfect; but rather, yielded to me in the many imperfect situations of this broken world.

Maybe this is right where I want you.  Limited.

Because then you and everyone else can see Who I Am. Limitless.